First, I think the most helpful piece of feedback was the recommendation that I work on the organization of my Peace Essay. For some reason, I had written my first draft as a sort of composition instead of a real essay. Therefore, I plan to totally re-vision my Peace Essay. By this, I mean I will probably alter what my main points are and how my ideas are organized within the paper (i.e. order of ideas).
Second, since I have written my first draft with a lot of Christian ideas and concepts, I think I will probably tone it down in my second draft. This might be better because peer readers might not appreciate or be tolerant of that kind of thing and might lose interest, unfortunately. Indeed, I wouldn't want to drown or overwhelm whoever reads my essay with my words.
Finally, I think I will follow the advice someone gave me who said I could give more specific personal examples. For instance, I can talk about how I lead a signing ministry as an example of how I witness to others (i.e. share my faith). These examples would tie down my essay and keep it to the ground, so to speak.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment